After Love
by Kosaka
Summary: sidefic/sequel to "falling over you". Jus' a pair of short lil' vignettes. Kagome and Kuma talk about their relationships. Sess and Inu talk about their relationships. . . awkwardly.
1. After Love

Disclaimer: Don't own Inuyahsa. Do own a five year old bottle of bubbles. . .  
  
Summary: Part of "falling over you" story arc. Takes place after "Falling over You" and "All he Needs". Pairings: Sesshomaru x Kuma, Inuyasha x Kagome.  
  
Kagome and Kuma talk about what the future holds.  
  
(Thanks to Jessica M. for reviewing! This is the start of the sequel, but, as you can see, I'm not really sure where to go with it. I'm happy someone likes Kuma! She's so damn stubborn.)  
  
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"After Love"  
  
by : Banshee Puppet  
  
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"Ne, Kagome? Do you.ever think about it?" Kuma asked, thumbs looped in her belt as the two girls walked side by side.  
  
It was afternoon, springtime, almost half-a-year since Kuma had fallen into the well and made a home of the feudal era. Nearly half a year since the girl had come so close to death, fallen in love with Inuyasha's brother, of all people.nearly half-a-year since Kuma Ayame had been human.  
  
Now, the cougar hanyou beside her walked casually, almost two heads taller than Kagome, looking peaceful, content, but also thoughtful and sadder than Kagome had ever seen her. So much had happened, Kagome realized. So much had changed. Kuma was a good friend, she figured, a thought that struck Kagome suddenly. They hadn't seen one another in far too long. Even if Kuma was very stubborn, she also had a very easy sort of kindness, and even if it was difficult for her to communicate what she was feeling, that didn't keep her from trying to. She almost wished Inuyasha would learn something from the girl, on that note at least.  
  
"Think about what?" Kagome asked.  
  
"You know.what comes after. What happens when you find all the shards? Will you go back home, stay here? If you go, will Inuyasha stay behind? You two love one another so much, anyone could see that, but.don't you ever wonder what comes next?"  
  
"What comes next? Kuma, this isn't like you. What do you mean, what comes next? This isn't really about me and Inuyasha, I can tell."  
  
Had Kagome thought about it? Of course. Too often, really. But thinking about it wasn't helping much, so she'd decided to try not to. What came after? What she was doing was too important. She didn't have time to be selfish. If she did, she wouldn't ever finish collecting the shards, because no matter how well things turned out, there would be something that she would lose.  
  
"I just want to know," Kuma said, stopping her stride and staring up at the leaves billowing with the warm breeze that was on the air. "What comes after love?"  
  
"After.love?" Kagome echoed, staring up at the deep longing in her friend's eyes. She sighed. "Is there something after love, Kuma?"  
  
"God, I hope so."  
  
"Has something happened between you and Sesshomaru?"  
  
"No. Nothing at all. That's sort of the problem. Don't get me wrong, Kagome. We love each other very much, but.we've come to this sort of stasis. Loving each other, that's habit. Kissing goodnight, that's ritual. But it's like there's a wall there, something we can't get past. Why can't we get past it? What is it? What happens when he gets bored of hunting youkai. What happens when he gets bored of me? I hurt. There's no reason for it at all, you know. It's just stupid. I'm so happy, but, I hurt so much, and I don't know why."  
  
There was a long silence before Kuma asked. "Don't you ever think about it, Kagome? At all?"  
  
"I try not to," Kagome answered. "Do I stay? Do I go? That's something to decide at the end. For now though, I just want to be with the people I care about." Kagome frowned thoughtfully. "You already made the choice once, Kuma. And at that time, I thought, you made it look so easy. But as much as I want to, I know, I don't belong here. If I did, I wouldn't keep going back, wouldn't have any reason to. You taught me that."  
  
"Did I? I don't remember."  
  
"You taught me that when you stayed."  
  
"Aah."  
  
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alrighty then, there's another one of these lil' vignette thingies with Sess and Inu that I'll upload soon. . . but I'm not really sure right now where to take this arc after that. R&R. Give me some opinions. What do you want to see? What do you not want to see? I'm coming close to a writer's WALL on this arc. Seriously. I want to continue, but, I'm not sure what to do next. Ah well, TTFN. 


	2. Just Breathing

Disclaimer: Don't own Inuyasha. Will never own Inuyasha. You know it. I know it. The white dog down the streets know it. And now, the lawyers no it too.  
  
Summary: part of "falling over you" story arc. Sess x Kuma, Inuyasha x Kagome. Sesshomaru and Inuyasha have a heart to heart about the women they love.  
  
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"Just Breathing"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
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To fill the awkward silence, they decided to.talk. Well, perhaps DECIDED isn't exactly the proper term. It was more like an internal pull that bordered on nervous instinct.  
  
After Rin had driven the two brothers adequately up the wall for the night with her innate cuteness, and gone off to play with Jaken, the threadbare silence became something resembling the threat of an explosion. Inuyasha sat with nervous shoulders, tight-backed and Sesshomaru met his brother's every resentful glance with an equally resentful sneer. But the boys knew, for the sake of the ones they loved, they had to at least tolerate one another, as each individually prayed that the girls returned soon.  
  
Finally though, it had become to much.  
  
"Kuma is like an annoying kid sister to me, so if you hurt her, I'll kill you," Inuyasha had said, dragging Sesshomaru out of frowning thoughts.  
  
"Hurt her? As usual, you couldn't have things more backwards, little brother," Sesshomaru mumbled half-heartedly, only realizing what he had implied after he had said it, and hoping that Inuyasha proved to be as thick-headed as he presupposed him to be.  
  
Unfortunately, Inuyasha understood perfectly. He gaped at Sesshomaru for a long moment, for the very first time noticing the pain in his eyes.  
  
"You.I don't believe it! You really do love her, don't you?" he blurted out before he knew what he was saying.  
  
Sesshomaru turned his face toward the hanyou and eyed him critically for a long moment before sighing. It seemed that they were about to have an important conversation. Mentally, he told himself, 'well, I suppose that there's a first time for everything.'  
  
"I watch her in her sleep a lot, just breathing. Everything seems so perfect in those moments. But lately, she's been distant. I don't understand. I've done everything exactly the same as she seemed to like, everything, down to the last detail. Her meals at the same time she always likes it, just the right amount of .contact.no more, no less. I thought I was doing everything right. Of course I love her. Don't be stupid. I don't even put this much effort into keeping Rin properly cared for."  
  
Inuyasha had met Rin.multiple times actually, and he could tell just by that what a piece of work taking care of her must be. Keeping her clean alone must take half-a-day of careful planning, and he chuckled, imagining Sesshomaru mother-henning the little human girl was nothing if not extremely amusing.  
  
Sesshomaru scowled at him.  
  
"Sorry. It's just.funny. You with a kid. But love, you know, it's not like making a gourmet dinner. You can't put in just the right amount of this and just the right amount of that and expect it all to work out perfectly. Kuma, she's really sort of." Inuyasha remembered the time he spent with the girl as he searched for the right adjective, and after a moment's consideration, he found the word he was looking for. "Hyperactive. She's a creature of change. Most humans are, and you know, she was human for a long time, you don't just get over that. If you want to keep her, you'll have to accept change a little more and just go with it. She's probably just bored."  
  
'Am I actually giving my brother relationship advice?' Inuyasha thought. This felt so easy, but there was no end to how strange it all was as well. He hated Sesshomaru.didn't he? No, not right now. Not when he was like this. His brother, they had one thing in common at least.watching. He had watched Kagome breathe in her sleep as well, many times.too many, really. Sure, he understood what love was. He understood how much it hurt to love, and how good it felt to love. It was really very confusing. Of course Sesshomaru would fuck it up by trying to logic it into some sort of system, to fit it into it's proper place in his life.  
  
"Oh, like you're an expert," Sesshomaru spat defensively.  
  
"I'm not," Inuyasha admitted. "I still wouldn't be with Kagome probably if it wasn't for Kuma. And.I don't know how to make Kagome stay either, but.I know it isn't by turning emotion into ritual."  
  
"Your woman is going somewhere?"  
  
"Not immediately. I know she loves me as much as I love her, but.she has people waiting for her.a home."  
  
"So go with her," Sesshomaru said as if it were obvious. "Have you got something particular holding you here?"  
  
Inuyasha thought about it for a long moment. ".Kikyo."  
  
"The miko? Isn't she dead?" Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow.  
  
"Yes.and no. She's.not at peace."  
  
"Then put her at peace and be done with her. That was fifty years ago. You need to get over it."  
  
"Like you got over father's death?"  
  
Stab. ".that's different."  
  
"How?" Inuyasha accused.  
  
"That's family."  
  
"So am I."  
  
".yes."  
  
'And the past haunts us even now.' They thought it simultaneously, and the silence dragged on.  
  
".so.what do we do?" Inuyasha asked.  
  
"I.don't know," Sesshomaru answered, more honestly, with more emotion on his voice than Inuyasha could remember ever hearing as he rested tired eyes, leaning back slightly onto his tail.  
  
Inuyasha's shoulders sagged. Sesshomaru didn't have any answers either; deep down, he always thought he did.  
  
".big brother?" he asked. It sounded awkward on his tongue, but also sort of right. They both noticed it.  
  
Sesshomaru lifted his head and half-opened his eyes. ".hm?"  
  
"Talking like this.I.I liked it."  
  
"..me too."  
  
"Why didn't we ever talk like this before? You know, before father died?" Inuyasha asked.  
  
"Because I hated you then too."  
  
"Even then?"  
  
Sesshomaru nodded. "Since before you were born, I hated you," he admitted with a hint of something in his voice that was almost-remorse.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because you and that human wo-your mother-were the ones that he loved best. And seeing how happy you were, and how oblivious, made me feel very lonely," he admitted less reluctantly than he felt he should have, but he didn't hate Inuyasha anymore. As of tonight, and he didn't understand why. Inuyasha was really.the only family he had left. "I.didn't realize."  
  
"Of course not. Besides, it doesn't matter. That was a long time ago, and I've decided, I don't feel like hating you anymore."  
  
"Since when?" Inuyasha asked incredulously.  
  
"Since now," Sesshomaru replied with a scowl. Really, Inuyasha could be so annoying sometimes. "I'm tired of talking."  
  
"They'll be back soon," Inuyasha nodded, frowning.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
".it hurts so much.being in love," the hanyou admitted.  
  
Sesshomaru sighed, locking his brother's golden gaze with one of his own, sadder and older, but also very similar.  
  
".yeah," he answered.  
  
And the pair sat in silence for a long time waiting for the others to return. Just sitting. Just breathing in the silence that speaks when there are no words.  
  
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Alright, well, that's it, that's the end. Uh.I plan to write a sequel that comes after these, but. . . *chews lip*. . . ah, evil evil writer's wall. . . anybody have a sledge hammer handy? R&R. I need thoughts and opinions. 


End file.
